This past Friday, I came across an article on Examiner’s website about the CEO of Starbucks, Howard Schultz. You can read the full article here (http://www.examiner.com/article/starbucks-ceo-no-tolerance-for-traditional-marriage-supporters) but in short, he apparently told all the shareholders who supported traditional marriage to “sell their shares and move them elsewhere”. Not too long ago, supporters of a traditional marriage boycotted Starbucks, resulting in a loss of revenue, as mentioned in the article.
My first semester at seminary, I stayed in the men’s dorm at Southwestern. To be honest, I was very excited about being in a dorm because what I know of dorm’s, I got from movies. What’s kind of ironic is that dorms, at least the guys dorm, is very much like what you see in movies, just replace sex, drugs, parties and beer with Dr. Pepper, NERF guns, Bible study and Halo…okay, so nothing like movies.
- We don’t wear robes. (That’s a monastery)
- We don’t read the Bible 24/7. (We have mountains of other books on top of that to read)
- We write more papers than the character limit on Twitter. (That’s 140, for those keeping track)
- We use big words like “normative”, “theology”, “ecclesiology”, “pronouns”, and “reading”.
- A lot of us balance work, school-work, ministry, family and funneling into our homes large amounts of coffee.
Needless to say, seminary is a daunting task to take on. And let’s not even talk about PhD work. Just ask anyone who has gone through, or attending seminary. With a Master of Divinity degree because all the other degrees don’t matter. I’m kidding, any degree you can get at seminary is a lot of hard work. It’s the equivalent of training to be a Spartan but we wear a lot more clothes than Gerard Butler. (Thankfully)
This past week, my wife and I got to have lunch with our new college group and meet the people in our group. We swapped stories about Wal-Mart, Apple, over-stepping boundaries and Seminary. It got me thinking back to when I first started seminary and all the crazy things I’ve come across.
When I first started seminary, I had no idea what I was in store for. To be honest, I thought my homework assignments would consist of reading the Bible every day. With some prayer thrown in. I basically thought I was going to be at a Christian monastery, wear a sack cloth robe and take a vow of silence. Luckily, what I thought seminary was going to be and what it is are two different things. Plus, I still got to play Halo.
I was told by a friend that the friends I made at seminary would last a lifetime. For some, this sounds terrible. After meeting some of my fellow single Christian guys, I understood why that may be a curse to some.
You see, Christian single guys (not all of them but some of them) are a little…well, special. If you’ve ever been in a youth group, you probably know how Christian singles act, at least, the guys. You remember them as the dudes who chugged Mountain Dew (a feat in and of itself), farted randomly and every now and then, burped during the lesson plan. Now that I’ve successfully made everyone who dreams of going to seminary rethink that dream, I’ll pause to say not all guys at seminary are like that. Just a handful.
Fortunately for those of you who may be stuck in youth group Timmy mode, I’ve put together some helpful tips for Christian single guys who are going to seminary:
- Unless you’re returning a book you borrowed, don’t break into a friend’s dorm room. Friends don’t B&E each other’s dorm (B&E=Breaking & Entering. You’re welcome). Especially to watch them sleep. (No joke, had that happen to me. I’ll detail more about in a future blog.)
- Don’t be “too friendly” with a friend. Remember Romans 1:27 my brothers.
- When you start an accountability group, be conscious of what you’re about to share with the group. It can turn a great meeting of sharpening & discipleship into an awkward share time. It gets especially awkward when there are women present. Or strangers you’ve never met. (Literally had a guy yell, “Thank you Jesus for my freedom of drug addiction!” I’m all for that kind of thing but I was taken off guard when I was in the library studying.)
- It’s a good idea to encourage a brother before he goes on a date. It’s not a good idea to follow him on the date, hiding in the bushes and texting him to sit closer to the girl he is on a date with. (Also had this happen to me)
- Try to refrain from relating class discussion to Pokemon.
- If you start a group of friends to go workout in the gym, refrain from sounding like an angry grizzly bear giving birth while working out.
- Quarters are sacred. Hoard those like they’re disappearing off the planet.
- Texting is a major form of communication. Be careful when you use it because you can easily creep girls out by mass texting them. Almost like a stalker. You don’t want to be this guy.
Do you have any weird college/seminary moments? Leave it in the comments below!